On 23rd June 2016, after having already submitted my postal vote weeks before, I spent my evening making jokes about dogs at polling stations. Because yes, I was worried, but I went to bed with at least some confidence in the fact that the UK would most likely do the right thing.
On 24th June I woke up, checked the news and promptly burst into tears. I was upset about the results, but I was also angry that hatred seemed to have won.
Last night, 8th November 2016, I made no jokes about dogs at polling stations (quite possibly because that's not a thing in the US) and instead had a very, very disturbed night's sleep.
On 9th November 2016, I woke up terrified to check the news. And then I did.
When I'd browsed the posts on #ElectionNight the previous evening, I'd been shocked to see young women the same age as me, proudly declaring their support for Trump.
And I didn't understand.
Because surely the overwhelming majority of so called millennial didn't want this? We're progressive and accepting and inclusive, right? Except I was wrong.
The thing is, when you surround yourself with those who share your values, it's easy to forget that not everyone does. Megan actually said this very well in under 140 characters today.
I'm sure I've read a version of what I'm about to say, put much more eloquently that I could, somewhere on the internet. But I can't find it, so here goes. Hatred and ignorance doesn't just come in the form of a 70-year-old business man turned wannabe politician turned President of the United States. It comes in the people that voted for this. The young women who, at a glance, I thought were just like me. The friends of friends who you see making racist jokes on Facebook. The distant relative who you can never quite bring yourself to start an argument with.
Six months ago, I'd seen more people post in favour of Remain than Leave. Six days ago, I'd seen more people for Clinton than for Trump. But here we are.
Racism and sexism and and bigotry is still a problem and, if we don't acknowledge this, how do we make it go away?